Friendships/Relationships

The Scout Master with whom I have a great relationship/friendship! (being goofy, of course).

I have to stay this.....I just don't understand some people. You try and try and try and still no matter what you do or how nice you are they just don't meet you half way, or any way at all.

I have found friendships to be hard to make lately. Is this some change I have made or is it the area that I now find myself in or just a set of unrelated circumstances? Maybe I have just grown tired of games and guilt trips.

In my mind any relationship should be founded on mutual trust, compromise and also an understanding for one another. If I can not and you can one time or you can not but I can another time it is up to us both to be understanding about the situations at hand and try to make the best of it. When a person is unable or unwilling to give of themselves freely, without guile, without being able to offer and need nothing in return, they can not open themselves to new relationships. A person needs to be willing and open to change around them, open to being touch and changed by those whom they allow in their lives. Without this they can not offer up their friendship and create new and lasting relationships with one another.

I have had struggling relationship in my life before and was really relived when I was able to give it up without feeling guilty about it. The burden of that friendship weighed heavily on me for years. Information I didn't want to know was thrust upon me. The burden didn't match the reward. And when it was finally given up, and the person was gone I was able to breath again. Sometimes however, you can not give up the relationship that is bringing you down. You keep them for various reasons like guilt, because you love someone who loves them, or because there isn't a polite way to walk away. These kinds of relationships take prayer and patience and balance.

I have always been the kind to wear my feelings not on my sleeve, but tucked in under my covers at home. However, the Scout Master was telling me the other day that, I am the kind of person that believes that a person is good until they prove that they are not. I am glad I am like that, even though at times it has caused me sadness and heartache.

It takes prayer and pointed effort to make some relationships/friendships work. If they don't work at first they may work out later, or they may not. I am one to keep trying to a point. Sometimes you just can't beat a dead horse anymore.

So here I am back to the beginning I will keep trying to make friendships and nurture those relationships that I already had made, give them all a fair shake and see where it leads me.

I know this isn't my usual kind of post, more thoughtful perhaps then my normal family story telling. A trip, some calls, and some other happenings have prompted me to weigh my current relationships and see where they fit in my life, if at all, or if they need more of my attention.

So if you are out there, let try to meet in the middle. I'll start walking your way and you start walking mine. Let's see where it leads us.